No matter how old we are, we still yearn for the approval of our parents. Well, I do anyway, even if I don't think about it constantly. My goal in life to is to be, just like my mom, but I know I will never be her, I just can't seem to be as good as her, at anything. I try, don't get me wrong, I try, and I will keep trying! She cooks, cleans, organizes, serves, has more patience, loves more, gives more, is overall better than I will ever be, and I want to be her when I grow up.
Through my married life, I have constantly been thinking, "what would my mom do?" Well, I fail sometimes, my house isn't near as clean as hers, I can't cook near as well, and she serves so many, and I always feel like I fall behind more and more being "just like my mom."
The other day, I was having one of those days, it was a Sunday, the kids were noisy, running all over, barely fed, but we made it to church, barely. I was thinking as we were leaving.."I have got to do better."
An unexpected thing happened that has changed how I feel about myself, and Damn it, I am proud of myself. My mom's best friend lives in the ward next to me, I usually go up to her and hug her, ask her how she is doing, all that friendly stuff; but what she said next changed my whole thought process.
She looked at me, and said, "so these are the kids I hear so much about!" I said, "yes, this is J...., this is S......, and you know Riley." She hugged the kids, told them how cute they were, and we talked for a minute, then she asked me, "how are you doing?" I said the usual answer we always give to our friends. "Good, thanks."
Here it is folks, the phrase I have been waiting for my whole life....she said, "your mom talks about them all the time, she is always telling me, 'I don't know how Brook does it'" What? What? My mom didn't know how I do it? Super mom...my mom, doesn't know how I do it? Maybe, just maybe, I have been a bit hard on myself, maybe I am a good mom...if my mom says so. I love you mom, you have taught me to be a great mom, and I will be forever grateful for your loving and compassion towards everyone. I thank my dear mom for dropping by unannounced to drop off some cookies for the kids, watching them when I need her, and just simply loving them, even though they are not biological, cause she knows that doesn't matter...she is the best grandma ever. I only pray I can be a pinch of what she is in this life. I love you mom, I don't know how you do it!
Through my married life, I have constantly been thinking, "what would my mom do?" Well, I fail sometimes, my house isn't near as clean as hers, I can't cook near as well, and she serves so many, and I always feel like I fall behind more and more being "just like my mom."
The other day, I was having one of those days, it was a Sunday, the kids were noisy, running all over, barely fed, but we made it to church, barely. I was thinking as we were leaving.."I have got to do better."
An unexpected thing happened that has changed how I feel about myself, and Damn it, I am proud of myself. My mom's best friend lives in the ward next to me, I usually go up to her and hug her, ask her how she is doing, all that friendly stuff; but what she said next changed my whole thought process.
She looked at me, and said, "so these are the kids I hear so much about!" I said, "yes, this is J...., this is S......, and you know Riley." She hugged the kids, told them how cute they were, and we talked for a minute, then she asked me, "how are you doing?" I said the usual answer we always give to our friends. "Good, thanks."
Here it is folks, the phrase I have been waiting for my whole life....she said, "your mom talks about them all the time, she is always telling me, 'I don't know how Brook does it'" What? What? My mom didn't know how I do it? Super mom...my mom, doesn't know how I do it? Maybe, just maybe, I have been a bit hard on myself, maybe I am a good mom...if my mom says so. I love you mom, you have taught me to be a great mom, and I will be forever grateful for your loving and compassion towards everyone. I thank my dear mom for dropping by unannounced to drop off some cookies for the kids, watching them when I need her, and just simply loving them, even though they are not biological, cause she knows that doesn't matter...she is the best grandma ever. I only pray I can be a pinch of what she is in this life. I love you mom, I don't know how you do it!
Love the Post. Isn't it funny how we are our own worst critic, but when we take a step back there are others who may be learning and trying to be just like you.
ReplyDeleteI would apologize for my house not being in order, (messy, stinking to the kitchen floor) my grandma would say (she had 6 kids and lived on a farm) enjoy it while it last because when they are gone your house will always be clean but empty without the chaos. Needless to say I never apologize about my house anymore, or if my kids have long shaggy hair because they need a haircut or leave the house with holes in their pants, as long as they are dressed and happy that is all I could ask for.
great post on mothers.
ReplyDeleteWe always want to do our best like are mothers.